Chinese American Says She Voted for Trump to ‘Stay Loved’ and ‘Close to Whiteness’: ‘I Immediately Hated My Choice’

A Chinese American lady who elected Donald Trump in the 2016 governmental election has actually exposed that she ‘instantly disliked’ her option, however did not yet think it was incorrect.

Julia Wu, the child of Chinese immigrants, explained weeping as she repelled from her ballot location and later on sobbing after Trump won the election. Regardless of her psychological response, she stated she at first had a hard time to accept that she had actually made the incorrect choice.

I instantly disliked my option, however I did not yet think it to be incorrect,’ Wu composed in an individual essay initially released by HuffPost in June 2025 and republished as part of its ‘Best Of’ series in 2026.

Wu stated her vote was formed by years of having a hard time to belong and by the impact of the white evangelical Christian environment in which she had actually matured.

Recalling, she determined 2 impulses that she thinks eventually drove her choice: the desire to ‘remain enjoyed’ and the desire to ‘remain near brightness’, which she stated had actually both been ‘repackaged as a desire to please God’.

Wu worried that she did not think electing Trump itself would bring her closer to either objective. Rather, she thought adhering to the expectations of the neighborhood around her may protect her location within it.

I wished to remain relied on and to be viewed as excellent, and I thought them when they informed me how to do it,’ she composed.

American football A Childhood Shaped by Wanting to Fit In

Wu matured in a primarily white, church-centred neighborhood in West Virginia.

Her moms and dads matured in China throughout the Cultural Revolution before transferring to the United States. Wu stated she did not totally comprehend their experiences when she was young and just discovered as a teen that her mom had actually remained in Beijing throughout the 1989 Tiananmen Square crackdown.

From youth, Wu understood being various. She remembered other kids questioning her look, while experiences at her Baptist preschool strengthened her awareness of her Chinese identity.

Wu stated her only Asian American buddy from high school later on informed her that her fundamental memory of Wu was hearing her consistently state that she disliked being Chinese and wanted she were white.

At the time, Wu stated she did not have the structure to comprehend those sensations through principles such as systemic bigotry, white supremacy or the design minority misconception. Rather, she attempted to browse her sense of distinction through assimilation.

‘I ‘d invested many years attempting to persuade white individuals and myself that I was among them, and I ‘d nearly done it,’ she composed.

American football How Church Shaped Her Political Thinking

Wu stated her church ended up being a main source of belonging and authority as she matured.

She explained an environment in which evangelical Christianity, patriotism and Republican politics ended up being linked in her understanding of what it indicated to be an excellent Christian. Nationally, white evangelical Christians extremely supported Trump in 2016, with exit ballot finding that 8 in 10 elected him.

Wu remembered seeing an American flag on the church phase, kids reciting the Pledge of Allegiance and praise services including patriotic tunes.

Ahead of the 2016 election, Wu signed up with an ‘Adopt A College Student’ ministry and was coupled with a pastor’s household. She stated the pastor’s partner regularly gone over politics with her, consisting of problems such as weapon control, bigotry and Hillary Clinton.

‘She provided ideologies as a presumed commonness, sparing me the chance to respond incorrectly,’ Wu composed.

By November, Wu stated she had actually heard enough criticism of Clinton to conclude that the Democratic prospect was not a choice. She stated she did not have equivalent discussions about Trump before casting her vote.

American football Wu Says Her ‘White-Adjacent’ Bubble Burst After Election

Following Trump’s success, Wu stated the sense of ‘white-adjacent’ security she thought she had actually constructed vanished. She explained hearing racist remarks from individuals she liked and facing the truth that her efforts to absorb might not avoid others from seeing her as Chinese.

‘I ‘d invested my life allying with brightness, and I could not think now how it had actually betrayed me,’ she composed.

The experience led Wu to reassess her understanding of race, politics, faith and her own identity. Recalling, she explained her 2016 vote as being connected not just to politics however likewise to her desire for belonging and approval.

Wu still resides in Huntington, West Virginia. She composed that everybody she likes either elected Trump or enjoys somebody who did. She likewise explained that she does not reflect on her vote with thankfulness.

I am not grateful to have actually made the error of choosing Donald Trump in 2016,’ Wu composed, including that she was however grateful to have actually reached ‘the opposite of a crisis point’.